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More from *Ferelwing

The Broken Patterns in my headI have broken patterns in my head
Fighting between living and wanting to be dead

I win the fight every single day
No matter what, I choose to stay

The burning pain that sears inside
The emotions that I try to hide

I wear a mask to keep it all away
Keep the horded masses at bay

Faking the the smile I hide the pain
Close my eyes and wish for rain

Standing up straight, I am strong
Refusing to cower, fighting against what's wrong

Wish that I could break free
Find a new way to be..

I talk of renewal and change so much
But I've only ever felt the softest touch

The circles I follow, they come back around
The same arguments, the same
Keep it all awayKeep the heart away.. Break it, shred it, descimate it..
Easier to tolerate a heart that doesn't work.. Right?
I am bitter inside.. Angry? No.. Just bitter..

Anger left me so long ago
I've almost forgotten what it feels like
White hot wasn't it?

No that can't be right...

Perhaps you could expound on it... No..

Wait.. Did I forget to care?

Hollow the words resonate inside me
That's all they are.. Words.. Actions speak louder

Words that I once believed in... Gone
Nothing left..
I burned up and burned out..

I keep the spirit alive.. On a respirator.. Grounded
Longing to find some place to finally give it all up..

Maybe I'm waitin
Running scaredRunning scared through the woods, the rains pouring down
Hunted like a rabbit.. Left, right, down.. Duck..
Don't let them catch me.. Heart beats faster as I realize
again.. Alone..

So very alone...

Facing the enemy, nothing and no one to trust..
Realizing that at any moment it might be me..
Lying face down in the ditch..

Hide and seek.. I prefer to seek...
Still.. It's my turn to hide.
Rapidly the footsteps approach..
I crouch.. Heart racing.. Hoping it won't be heard over the pitter
patter of the rains..
Heavy as they fall..
Lighting streaks into the sky
Fear beats, has it given me away..
Duck my head down feel the cold
A
Bow for NoneI tilt my head back and close my eyes
Longing for the rain that never comes..
It's not crying if it's raining.. It's just raindrops..
Why won't it storm when I need it?
I could hide it all behind the droplets
Let them cover for my weaknesses..
I long for the sound of the thunder
The brilliant flashes of light
Walking in the raging storm
Releasing the emotions wound so tightly..
Emotions that I could never fully express..
I shudder inside as I try to regain control..
Broken pieces.. Lost parts.. Nothing fits together..
Who to trust.. Where to listen? All the words jumble
And I stare at my own mind's image..
Hollow.. Weak.. Path
Rocks Don't cryI close my eyes and look at my soul
Just the pits of disaster inside
I could walk away from it all
Let it burn to the ground
Burn the bridges and never look back..

Close my eyes and become someone else
But.. it's nothing, a dream..
I could never..
All the things, those scars, pains
Mine, me.. I am those.. Nothing more

Everytime I try to shield myself
I break inside.. Little by little the cracks
they come..
Peeking out at me.. Weakness
Tears that long to be shed..
Never...
I am a rock.
Rocks don't cry. Even when they long to.
Even when there's no other way...
No tears.. I will shed nothing.
Nothing or Am IEmotions failed me
Belief?
Gone...

Everytime I stand up
I fall back down
The same fights
The circles keep returning
Going back and forth
No end in sight

If I fight?

Nothing..

I am nothing.. Or am I?

Featured in Groups:

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Details

April 4, 2012
1.8 MB
2200×3000
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Comments: 23
Favourites: 89 [who?]


Views: 684 (0 today)
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:iconferelwing:
The tears wouldn't stop falling, she'd lost him. A stupid game and he was lost to her...

He reached out trying to find her, her voice was so near and yet it was as if they were in two different places.

**************


Models: :iconferelwing-stock: and

Background: Purchased from Renderosity.

** I had this piece here previously but couldn't find it so I am reuploading it. **
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:iconjocelyner:
*JocelyneR May 19, 2012
This beautiful work is featured in my latest journal [link] . :heart:
Reply
:iconferelwing:
*Ferelwing May 20, 2012  Professional Digital Artist
Aww! Thanks so very much! I'm so glad you liked it enough to feature it! :blush: I really appreciate it.
Reply
:iconjocelyner:
*JocelyneR May 20, 2012
It is an awesome work! You are so very welcome! :hug:
Reply
:iconferelwing:
*Ferelwing Aug 9, 2012  Professional Digital Artist
:blush: Aww thanks again!
Reply
:iconisamon:
*isamon Apr 16, 2012  Student Photographer
FEATURED [link] :aww:
Reply
:iconferelwing:
*Ferelwing Apr 19, 2012  Professional Digital Artist
:blush: Aww wow! :huggle: Thanks so very much!
Reply
:iconarlouette:
=Arlouette Apr 10, 2012  Student Photographer
Love it.
Reply
:iconferelwing:
*Ferelwing Apr 10, 2012  Professional Digital Artist
:blush: :huggle: Thank you!
Reply
:iconarlouette:
=Arlouette Apr 10, 2012  Student Photographer
:love:
Reply
:iconfiyas:
~FIYAS Apr 7, 2012
Great work.
Reply
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